Weekly Recaps
Post-round write-ups from the commissioner
If week-1 is any indicator on how this year’s Putter-In-Hand league is going to go, it’s going to be a raucous 2018 and the reformed Grand Island Six will retain their position as most hated putters in the league…and most inebriated every week!
The group convened at The Grill for a pre-season drink or two before entering the turnstile to the Dome. There to greet each putter was the media who was looking to capture the mood and confidence level of each putter as they entered. With a mix of confidence and pessimism, the last to enter was PIH newcomer, and 2018 LukeOlympic Co-Champion, Mike Mondoux who looked into the camera and declared “I think I win today and I’m done for the rest of the year.” And with that, commissioner Jeff Luke went over the league rules with the group and participants scattered for the shotgun start.
Unsure if it was the increase in number of players or the historically low numbers put up in seasons past, 2018 started off slow. It wasn’t until 10-minutes in before the season’s first hole-in-one was sunk by the 17th place finisher in 2017, Scott Mason. Mason stalled from there and finished in the middle of the pack, tied for 8th, with a 42 and one hole-in-one. Mason likes to start out in the middle of the pack before faltering towards season-end and finish near the bottom.
Playing with Mason was 2017 16th place finisher Tim Roesch who did what Timmi likes to do which is putt first every hole. Giving an unfair advantage to everyone in his grouping, the PIH Ethics Committee is gathering before week-2 to determine the rules around such actions. It’s unknown at press time whether a new rule has been established but if the past predicts the future, the league will come down on this sort of action in the coming hours. Roesch finished in 7th place with a respectable 41 with one hole-in-one.
Paired with Mason and Roesch was new-comer Mike Mondoux who, if you recall, predicted big things in week-1 before the round kicked off. Benefitting from Roesch’s actions, Mondoux shot the 2nd best week-1 round of all time, holing two holes-in-one and a 39, capturing the green jacket by one stroke over his bestie Shawn Conschafter. Asked after the round what propelled him to the top he quickly replied “I was putting with some dumb-dumb who kept going first. He would give me the perfect look every hole. All I had to do was execute. And I did. Concho will be so proud of me.” These words were heard loud and clear by league officials but did assure the players involved no penalty would be given to any of the parties involved. The only question around Mondoux that remains is – what did Mondoux mean by “I’m done for the rest of the year.”? Will he putt again? Is he gonna tank like Tim Remy and never get a sniff of the green jacket again? Or did he wear the jacket like a champion over the past week and doesn’t want to return it? If the pictures TMZ captured of him are any indicator, PIH officials should start looking for a replacement jacket for week-2.
With 2/3’s of the 2018 LukeOlympic Champions finishing 1-2, the big question was – where’s Coyle? Sitting alone in 12th place, Coyle let down his playing partners and shot a weak 43 with no holes in one. Such performance on the green, and having to be carried (figuratively not literally) during LukeOlympics, the talk around the island is that Mondoux and Conschafter are looking to dump Coyle in favor of 3rd place finisher Chris Wilkinson or send Coyle packing and partnering Wilkinson with him. Wilkinson showed the league that he’s taking this league serios and that he came to win the jacket and represent the GI6. It’s too early to tell how things will shake out with LukeOlympic pairings, and Conschafter and Mondoux are dismissing the rumors as “fake news”, but rest assure that if Coyle’s poor performance continues and Wilkinson competes, there will be serious talk about 2019 LukeOlympic pairings.
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Tied with Wilkinson in 3rd place was 2018 winner and runner-up, Tom Barbops and Jeff Luke. Neither putter could sink a hole-in-one but did manage to finish in the top-5 for the 3rd straight week going back to 2017. Odds are, you can expect one, if not both putters, in the top-5 each week of the season.
Finishing in 6th place was Scott Wilson who was coming off his best career finish in week-8 last year (finished 2nd) with a 41 and two holes-in-one. Wilson is still looking for his 1st green jacket which could be closer than ever expected given his most recent performances.
Finishing tied for 8th place was Roesch, Tim Remy and another new-comer Frank DiJames, each scoring a 42 with one hole-in-one. No one expects much more out of Remy who was uncomfortably dressed in a button down shirt and pleated slacks. When asked where the sweat pants were, Remy quipped “They say dress good, feel good, putt good, right? Well?” I guess he looked average as that was his finish. Falling victim to the “bounce out”, DiJames was content with his performance saying after the round “I had to pull over 3 times to puke on the way to the Dome. I just didn’t want to finish last. The nerves are out, I’ll be better going forward.” Only time will tell how this ne-comer takes the pressure in the weeks to come.
Also falling victim to the “bounce out” was Jay Flemming who shot a surprisingly poor 44 with one HI1. If Flemming hopes to contend again this year, he has some making up to do as 16th place is no way to start a winning year.
Making his return to the PIH league and finishing 11th place, was Jeff Kelly who shot a 42 with no HI1. JK isn’t expected to do much with a baby on the way but could surprise some as he is a past champion*. Speaking of not doing much, shooting a 43 with no HI1 was Joe Neeson who tied for 12th with fellow GI6 member, Coyle. Neeson is a perennial bottom feeder and as he predicted at the onset, he isn’t going to be a factor in 2018.
Also making his return to PIH was “The Athlete” James Geniti who didn’t appear to athletic as he scored a 17th place 46 with no HI1. Giving his new-found-love and travelling schedule, some expect this to be his best finish of the year. Tied with Geniti was another perennial bottom feed Scott VeRost. VeRost never expects to finish anything better than bottom-5 which is good, cause in most cases he doesn’t. His play hasn’t caused any controversies however his score keeping has. Verost turned in a score card with three names on it; only his name did he get right. League officials were ready to assess a 2-stroke penalty on each putter but after a long deliberation chose to rather institute a new rule effective week-2: Scott VeRost may never keep score for his group ever again. If so, they are all assessed a 2-stroke penalty. PIH rules will be updated to account for this new rule.
Rounding out the field was new-comer Pat “Death Star” Holden who shot a week-1 worse 47 with no HI1. After the match TMZ caught up to Holden and asked him what happened. He said “There are so many hot bodies putting in this league, I can’t think straight let alone see straight; all I see are curves!” Asked what he was referring to Holden quipped “Nothing. Never mind” and took off for the bar.
(NOTE: Three members post-putted (Bryan An: 14th place 43 and 0 HI1; Nick Keil: 44 and 2 HI1; Joe LaBuda 47 and 1 HI1) and three must putt before week-2 tee-off if they don’t want to incur a 2-stroke penalty.)
And with that, week-1 was in the books and Coors Light was in the bar. Drinks were flowing and Conschafter was stealing drinks. If this week was any indication of how the after-party is going to be each week, it’s expected a lot of sick-days will be had over the next several Fridays!
FUN FACTS:
- Week-1 average: 42.6 (more than 2-strokes better than week-1 2017)
- 14 holes in one in week-1 (one more than week-1 last year)
- Best front-9: 19 (Wilkinson)
- Best back-9: 18 (DiJames, Mason, Conschafter)