Recaps | PIH League Manager

TONAWANDA, NY –

Still reeling with the infidelity allegations at the (wandering) hands of Tim Remy, scandal hits the league once again. This time, it's Dean Trzewieczynski who is in the spotlight after he was caught turning in an incorrect scorecard.

Trzewieczynski turned in a scorecard that read 40 with two holes-in-one, one stroke and two holes-in-one better than Kevin Kelly's 41 with no holes-in-one. The green-jacket was Trzewieczynski's...but not for long.

League Leader and League Auditor Tom Barbops was looking at Trzewieczynski's partner Scott Wilson's round when he noticed the error in Trzewieczynski's score. "It just didn't add up. He had all 2's but two 3's. It was easy to see he didn't score a 40 but rather a 41." Commissioner Lukasavich checked the score and Trzewieczynski in fact scored a 41! Chaos ensued and league participants were calling for Trzewieczynski's resignation and demanded he hand the green jacket over. Trzewieczynski was dismayed at his gaffe but claimed innocence as the green jacket was literally stripped from his hands. When Lukasavich went to take the weekly winnings from Trzewieczynski, he ran to the bar and ordered 20 shots for himself. League participants charged Trzewieczynski and downed the shots in disbelief. "I've known Dean for a long time, I never thought he would pull a stunt like this." said long-time friend Tim Roesch. Trzewieczynski is a pharmacist when not putting or traveling with his girlfriend, is used to counting by 5's which may explain things. Fellow putter and

pharmacist, Jay Flemming said "that's what we do. Count by 5's. I think it was an honest mistake." "It's bullshit. He's a cheater. Him, Pete Rose, Shoeless Joe Jackson. They're all cheaters. I wouldn't doubt he was a fucking Patriots fan." said an angry Scott Wilson In response to the pharmacist excuse. Trzewieczynski rejected an interview for this article the day after the incident, instead directing all media inquiries to his lawyers: Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe. Then on Friday, the league's competition committee met in NYC where Trzewieczynski appeared before the panel to plead his case. Reporters were not allowed in the courtroom but a courtroom sketch artist did catch the tension in the room as Trzewieczynski's fate was in the hands of the committee. Taking into consideration league participants opinions that ranged from Pee-Wee Herman's "I say we let him go" to some saying that his round should be thrown out, to penalty strokes being assessed, or as some are calling for, banishment from the league. Late Friday, league officials announced that Trzewieczynski will be dean

assessed a 4-stroke penalty, a 3-week probation, and 1-minute of community 'service' in the men's room of the Dome at the conclusion of the Open Championship next week. The 'beneficiary' of these services will be the last place golfer next week. The competition committee also stated that any future stroke shaving will result in that golfer's score being discarded for the week.

As for the action on the course, it was an ugly week for most putters. Going in to the U.S. Open, Tom Barbops was the leader. Despite shooting a 5th place 45, a horrible round by his standards, he remains on top of the league standings. He claims that his playing partners poor play had brought down his game. And we don't think that's far off from the truth. Sitting in 3rd place going into week-4, Mark VeRost was in a car accident on the way to the course and scored a 49, but moved into 3rd place pending any make up rounds. VeRost was rear-ended by another vehicle at a stop sign and claims he possibly had whiplash. Doctors were not called to the scene and VeRost was in stable condition the following day. To round out the 3-some was 4th place Jeff Lukasavich. Jumping into the top group after Jeff Kelly once again was a late scratch, Lukasavich consumed 2 beverages before the match and shot a personal-worse 50 but managed to stay near the top in the overall standings in 3rd place (again, pending any make-up rounds). Lukasavich claims to have possibly been roofied, and after the Stroke Shaving scandal hit, he doesn't doubt that Trzewieczynski had something to do with it. "I couldn't see straight from the 4th hole on. Dean and I had big money on the match and as you see, he'll do anything to try and take back a few dollars that he's lost to me over the years." Asked how much money Trzewieczynski has lost to him over the years, Lukasavich replied "let's just say my kids will be going to any college they want, full ride on the Trzewieczynski Fund." Checking with league officials, gambling is encouraged within the league so no worries about another scandal.

Playing in the 2nd group was Brian Kimpel , Whitey Ondak and Jay Flemming. Kimpel scored an impressive hole-in-one on the dogleg hole-5 and put together a 23 on both the front and back-9. His 46 was good for 7th place which is where he sits overall. Flemming struggled with the belly putter, posting a 6 on hold 8 and a 27 on the front. He recovered a bit on the back but not enough to make up that horrible start. Flemming finished tied for 12th and sits 10th overall. Ondak was rolling and you can see he thought this was his night to wear the green jacket. Ondak posted a solid 20 on the front and started off the back with back to back twos. Then the wheels fell off. Ondak followed the path his son-in-law Lukasavich took on hole 12, trying to cut through the sand trap. Ondak failed to make it through the trap and took a drop. He proceeded to hit the ball into the trap two more times and posted an 8 on the hole. Holding the club over his head like an old man wielding a cane, Ondak vowed never to listen to his son-in-law again and left the course with an 8th place 47, and sits in 6th place overall. The 3rd group, paired with 'Cheatin-Trzewieczynski' was fellow cheater Tony Remy and the honorable Scott Wilson to keep things in check. Wilson, who posted a 45-44-43 the previous 3 weeks, couldn't keep the streak of shaving a stroke off his score every week (guess he left that to Trzewieczynsk) as he recorded a 45, good for a tie for 5th. Analysts still look to Wilson, who currently sits in 8th place overall, as a dark-horse to take a green jacket before the season is over. Remy, who is clamoring to take the jacket back to Denny's, failed to do much this week as he shot a pedestrian 47, good for 8th place and drops him to 11th overall. Rounding out this week's pairings were the 4 stooges, Tim Roesch, birthday boy Joe Mills, Kevin Kelly and Harald Rehm. Kevin Kelly was steady all night posting nothing but 2's and 3's over all 18 holes recorded a 41 and 1st place thanks to Trzewieczynski's accounting 'error'. Unfortunately for Kelly, due to the unknown ruling of the league, he never got to wear the green jacket. League officials are said to have used this when determining Trzewieczynski's fate...in a good way. Prior to the match, Kelly was said to be gunning for the jacket as he wanted to win it and "bust out of it like the Incredible Hulk." Despite Kelly's performance, he still sits in 12th place. Roesch was back to his old ways, shooting a 52, putting him in dead last for the week and in 14th place overall. Celebrating his 33rd birthday, Mills posted a 44 and was as angry as a 77-year-old, screaming obscenities at the commissioner after demanding the tables be arranged a certain way. The curmudgeon old man finished in 3rd place and sits in 15th overall. And finally,

Harald, who finally broke 50 and shot a personal best 48. He still sits in dead last overall but did finish in the top-10 for the first time...ever. Vegas has the odds of him taking home the green jack at 100,000 to 1 in any of the next two weeks. Good luck Harald. Pre-putting this week was 2nd place finisher Joe Neeson who shot a 42 and moves him to 4th place overall. More impressive was his 12-year-old son Callen who shot a 51, 1 stroke better than Roesch and just one stroke off Flemming and Lukasavich. Nice work Callen, you have tour potential. Week-5 is The Open Championship and worth 1.5 points. Barbops will need to falter once again in order for anyone behind him to pass him. Knowing Barbops was the one to out Trzewieczynski and and the roofie allegations against Trzewieczynski, Barbops will be watching his back all week. Week-4 Fun Facts:

Average Score: 47.82 (2+ strokes worse than last week)
Total Holes-in-One: 4 (5 fewer than last week, 8 fewer than week-2)
Best Front-9 week-4: 20 – Ondak (2nd week in a row)
Best Back-9 week-4: 19 – Kevin Kelly & Mills
Most Improved (w3-w4): -9 – Kevin Kelly
Biggest Drop (w3-w4): +10 – Lukasavich
Wilson, Flemming and Steck still haven't recorded a hole-in-one
VeRost and Trzewieczynski lead with 5 holes-in-one
4 holes-in-one were recorded in week-4; 8 in week-3; 12 in week-2; 11 in week-1
Barbops has recorded the fewest total strokes over 4-weeks, 8 ahead of VeRost
Rehm broke 50
Wilson has improved his score by 1-stroke each week (45-44-43)
4 golfers have recorded better than a 3 on hole-2 (Roesch and Jeff Kelly)
Ondak's 8 on hole-12 is two strokes worse than any other score ever recorded on a hole.

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